Grant you, this probably sounds like indecision, but for me it is an accomplishment.
I took a deep breath and told my advisors that I will not be pursuing the thesis that they had signed off on back in April. I need to work on something meaningful to me, not just to my advisors. No wonder I felt like I was on the wrong track.
Getting back to the research I want to do will likely require new advisors, perhaps a whole new faculty. But it will be worth it if I can find a good fit.
I've been ruminating on this decision for months (anxiety, anyone?). But now, I'm going to do my best to relax and enjoy the rest of the summer without thinking about my future.
Sometimes decisions aren't easy and we need to take time to make them (which can be uncomfortable) rather than jumping into something just to say that we've made a decision. When I started thinking about going to medical school, it took me an entire year to make the decision. It was a difficult year, but it felt so much better in the end knowing that I'd given the decision the time it deserved. Wishing you the best as you sit with your decision for a while. Enjoy the summer!
ReplyDeleteGlad you are starting to navigate forward. It does sound like you need a better fit than what you have.
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